Looking at this picture too long gives me the chills. Maybe it's because it's so vaguely familiar to me. The darkness and the repetitive swivel. For those who may be interested in knowing, this is exactly what my worst nightmares look like. Blankness filled to the brim with tension and uneasiness, not monsters or anything like that. I have actually stopped checking under my bed when I grew up and realised that the monsters, they were living inside of me.

Or perhaps it's the words and what they mean to me. Five simple words that really strike me every single time they're thrown around. I live simply and ordinarily, I'm content. Alas, it feels as if I'm never quite "enough". I'm ambitious and sometimes I don't think anyone can understand why some things would matter so much to me; but it does matter. Everything matters to me. I'm an idealist.

Sometimes the journey gets so hard and like Blaire Waldorf, I'm not willing to be "a stop along the way. I'm a destination." It's funny because I've had about two people tell me that I remind them of Serena. But deep down I know I'm truly a Blaire. Or a random girl who's face gets half a second of camera time at one of Blaire's parties. Either way...

I've been so busy lately. Today I finished measuring up a job for dad. He offered me a thousand bucks. No matter how lazy I am, I could not refuse a thousand bucks. I don't really want the money. Instead, I want him to buy me a camera so I can learn to take pretty pictures of my clothes when I finally open my blogshop. Oh hell yeah, I know you're excited. It's been quite a lot of fun choosing the stock and well, I'm quite picky so I've only gotten about a handful of things I actually really want in store. I just want every single piece to be either something I would love to wear or something cute and vintage. I'm sure there's got to be people out there who share the same taste!

You know what? All the hard work will eventually be worth it in the end.